Life Lessons from the Yooper Mr. Rogers

The Yooper Mr. Rogers (my Grandpa John) is 96! Here's what we all can learn from everyone's new favorite grandpa.

If you know me, then you probably know of my Grandpa John—who is now your grandpa, too (I don’t make the rules). If you don’t, the cliff notes version of him is if Mr. Rogers had a long lost brother who was born and raised in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan (someone who’s from there is known as a Yooper), all while adding in the quiet, gentle positivity of Bob Ross. But make that an incredibly accomplished mechanical engineer with a stroke of genius and a maniacal work ethic. And if you’ve ever talked with him, you also may know how utterly determined and excited he was to make it to 96 years old—breaking all the record ages in his extensive genealogy (which he has memorized meticulously). Grandpa John is also one of the wisest people I’ve ever met, in spite of—and because of—everything that goes along with age.

His birthday lunch at 96 years young!!

Telling you that I feel fortunate to have been raised in part by Grandpa John is an understatement, as he has been instrumental in shaping my outlook, my priorities, and who I am for the better. It is my hope that you already have your version of Grandpa John in your life; he is one of those people whom I feel should be cloned and delivered to the doorstep of everyone out there. Because I can’t shove a 96-year-old Grandpa in a box and ship him to you overnight, I hope to bring some of him to you through what I write. Here are the most influential life lessons that I’ve learned from Grandpa John:

Showing up and spending time with others matters, especially in the mundane.

It sounds so cliche, but it’s true: 90% of showing someone that you care and building a relationship with them is just showing up. It’s so simple, but in today’s age of prioritizing comfort over connection, it’s profound. Growing up, Grandpa John dropped me off and picked me up from school almost every single day (along with my parents, whenever they could) from elementary school to my last day of senior year. He went to most piano recitals, track meets, choir concerts and almost every single event that I had, whenever he could. Grandpa John not only showed up for me, which made me feel able to rely on him, but he made an effort to genuinely connect with me while he showed up. It didn’t even matter what he said, but it was the fact that he made showing up for me a priority over and over again. He has inspired me to also do my absolute best to prioritize showing up for the people in my life, and for others in general whenever I can. Showing up for people has made my relationships with others richer, and allows me to truly get to know them on a deeper level, and to show others how much they matter to me.

Optimism is a superpower, and gratitude really does change your life.

Grandpa John is the single most optimistic person on the planet. You will never hear him complain when he isn’t directly voicing a need or a concern, and he never ceases to consistently state out loud what he’s grateful for in a genuine, heartfelt way. He is so grateful, in fact, that this gratitude has formed an unbreakable source of optimism that has gotten him through two heart attacks, diabetes (or as we say, die-uh-beet-us), a burst appendix at 82 (he somehow survived and was out of the hospital in two days), and the medical consequences of old age. Many doctors of his have never seen a case like Grandpa John’s, where he beat insane odds and manages to not only survive, but to do well and be happy.

Grandpa John genuinely believes that things will work out the way that they’re meant to. He has this unshakeable awareness of his good fortune, and he never ceases to be reminded—and to remind others—of how lucky he is. He takes time to savor his favorite things: his daily walks, spending time with family, the mom-and-pop Chinese restaurant in our town, and pastries from the local coffee shop. He manages to find joy in every day and circumstance (I’m not exaggerating. If you’ve met him, you already know this). It is through his optimism and unwavering gratitude for everything—even the hardships—that has taught me to try and follow suit.

Faith can move mountains.

In almost every conversation with Grandpa John, the topic of faith will come up in some way. The man probably says “God bless” to people 100 times a day, and he means it. Though he hasn’t been to church in a while (he cites CoVID concerns), he is the most prayerful person I know. In the same vein as his optimism, he believes wholeheartedly that God provides and that prayer works. Seeing my Grandpa live out his faith on the daily through his kindness and how principled he is has helped inspire me to begin exploring my own spirituality.

Move your body daily; if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it.

Grandpa John walked nearly two miles on his 96th birthday, just like he does every single day. When he got a dog some 30 odd years ago, he began to walk each day, and his walking habit is what Grandpa himself credits his health to. He is more spry and full of vigor than most people half his age. It’s not so much that he goes hard all the time or even that he works up a sweat; it’s that Grandpa John moves his body consistently and that he makes it a priority, no matter what. Grandpa John’s habits have allowed him to avoid being confined to an assisted living facility. He lives on his own and is able to practice the independent living skills that us able-bodied youngins so easily take for granted. He plays with our family dog, and grabs coffee and lunch with me; he meets so many lovely people on his daily walks, all of whom know and love Grandpa John. It’s because of him that I try to move my body every day, whether it’s stretching, a walk, or a workout.

Above all, Grandpa taught me that good health is a privilege that isn’t guaranteed throughout our lives, and that your health truly does determine the basis for your quality of life. I’ve learned from him that each day that we do have good health is a blessing, and celebrating your body for what it can do (rather than criticizing your body for how it looks) can make movement joyful and celebratory, rather than punitive.

Grandpa John getting his steps in, and wearing his new hat. A happy camper!

Hardship is inevitable. How you respond to hardship shapes its impact, and builds your character.

Grandpa John is one of the most infectiously joyful people around, so it might surprise you to learn that he has had an incredibly tough go in life. The events that happened to him aren’t my stories to tell, so I’ll hold off on the specifics. What I will tell you is that he has not only remained un-jaded in spite of these circumstances, but he’s developed an endless well of resilience and grit. During hardships, Grandpa has always focused on the things that are going well for him, while also doing whatever he can to mitigate the difficulty of what’s going on. It’s so, so easy to feel powerless and exhausted during stressful times, and it can be a challenging thing to remain positive when you’re going through it. However, if the hardship is going to happen anyway, I’ve learned that things will be much better if you try to make the best of it, whether that’s through problem-solving, processing your emotions, or utilizing coping skills. Just like hardship can shape your life for years (if not a lifetime) after it occurs, your responses to challenges can also shape the after-effects that you may have down the line.

PLEASE NOTE that I’m not saying that this should be generalized to everybody’s circumstances, including yours. The exact same situation can leave completely different impacts from one person to another, and the nuances of each person’s circumstances (however similar or different) are completely unique. What I am saying is that everyone has a certain level of agency. Doing what you can to better your situation and to create moments of joy in the midst of hardship—whatever that looks like for you—can make you a more resilient person and can build your character if you allow it to.

Become acquainted with your values, and live by them.

Upon your first impression, Grandpa John may strike you as a gentle and meek spirit. Don’t get me wrong, he certainly is those things, but he has a hidden fierceness and tenacity that often flies under the radar. Grandpa is dedicated to what he believes in (if you spin around and say “Donald Trump” three times, an irate Grandpa John will appear), and does his darndest to put his values into practice. The values that he lives by (integrity, prioritizing family, service to others, and working hard) have shaped how he treats others, and ultimately, how he treats himself. Grandpa’s taught me that what we internalize, we become; and what we prioritize lays the groundwork for what our lives look like.

Service to others over service to self.

This is one of the most critical things that Grandpa John (among others) has taught me. When you focus on the needs of the people around you and pour into them as much as you can, you truly can make their lives better. Whether it’s a kind word, a smile or showing up for others (see lesson #1), Grandpa and I alike both strongly believe that we all have an obligation to be of service to others, whether that’s through work, your family, your friendships, or strangers. Serving others makes you a kinder, more loving and empathetic person, and I cannot think of a person that lives in service to others more than my Grandpa John.

In today’s world, where isolation and a general sense of helplessness can easily abound, it is more important than ever to tap into what you can do to positively impact others, and to love them well. Everybody wants strong friendships and people whom they can count on when they need it, but being able to rely on others in times of need first requires you to be there for others when they need it. Grandpa John is universally adored in part because of how consistently and eagerly he serves others—with zero expectations or conditions. He just serves because he can, and because it’s the right thing to do. I can only hope that I try to emulate him in this regard each day.

Willow and her FAVORITE human. No competition, here!

You are powerful; the energy that you put out can shape not only you, but the world around you.

This last lesson is courtesy of both Grandpa John and his daughter (my mom, who says this to me all the time). Grandpa John is one of those people that whenever you walk away from him, you feel better, even if the interaction is short. He carries such a positive, warm and gentle energy wherever he goes, and people pick up on that right away. Even by saying nothing, he still brightens others’ days by how he moves through the world, and I’m trying to cultivate an awareness of how my energy impacts people in the moment. I hope that you recognize your own presence and just how impactful you can be. Even if you don’t know what to say or do, you emitting a certain energy or vibe can shift how others feel when they finish speaking with you.

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Grandpa John is one of the most unique people I’ve ever met, and it is my hope that you can take what you’ve read from this post and reflect on how it applies to either your own life, or how some of Grandpa’s characteristics coincide with others who are significant in your life. If you have a Grandpa John in your life (older or otherwise), I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to make them feel loved and truly appreciated—not for what they do for you—but for the wonderful person that they are.

As much as my aim while writing this was to pass on a bit of Grandpa John to you and to brag on him (as one can never do enough for someone like him), it also is to gently encourage you to reflect on how you move through the world; how you interact with others, and what you want to take away from each day. There is so much chaos and strife, and as much as we cannot control the broader circumstances in our world, it is up to all of us to become the people whom we wish to see more of.

May we all know a Grandpa John, and may we grow into our own versions of him.

I hope that you have a fantastic week ahead, and if you want to see more of me, consider subscribing: